Lessons from my guitar...

 

Before a guitar string snaps it gives you little signs that all is not well. If you are in tune (😉) with your instrument you will pick it up quickly, if not, it might just snap and hit you in the eye! One sign is that you need to adjust that one string more than his brothers, another is more visible - a little loose bit that comes away from the other strands...slowly weakening the chord until it breaks by playing even just an Em. Another is that it just doesn’t sound quite right, there is an extra vibration...very easy to miss if you are giving it your all surrounded by other musicians making a great big noise. But still, if you ignore these signs or are not in tune you will get twanged!  Lately i have been thinking about this. It is as if my life is just a little bit out of tune. I need more adjustments than normal. I feel a bit as if i am unraveling. I am not In Tune.

Weirdly enough it comes at a time where I actually feel happy for the first time in forever. No - more than happy! I have this deep joy that just bubbles to the surface. But then...i look down and see a little loose strand and i know, if I don’t take time out or give attention, i might snap and hit myself in the face. Why now, i wonder, in this time of joy?  The answer is quite surprising - i was starting to shift from fight and flight to rest and digest☺️... 

I look back over the past 4 years and all i see is.... survival mode. Standing at the back of a band pressing the right chords, making sound but unable to hear my tune. Going through the moves. Unaware (or in denial really) of the state of my strings, but then as i stepped off the stage and left the band and noise, i could take stock. And i saw. And heard. We are tired, my guitar and i. Worn out. Time for time out. Time for new strings. 

Fixing a guitar is easy. But a person? And i whisper a little question...how Lord? And i hear.. Abide in Me.  And He, creator of music, lovingly takes me in His firm hands, and starts the process of restringing me. Undoing my state of survival. Oh, to be tuned and ready for New Songs. It will take time and i might feel a bit useless while this undoing goes on, but it will be worth it. 

Bella