Strangely encouraged

The year of impossible losses continues....
It might be official that 2017 has ended and 2018 has started but to me it is just another day of continuing loss. 
It is never a good idea to write on a Sunday evening at 10:30. 
Facebook was the culprit or instigator if you like, for tonight’s reflexion.
A year ago it read. A road trip into new territories for us - and little did we realize then the roads we would be going on. 
Smiling pictures of us and new friends. When smiling came easy.
A nice plate of food not cooked by myself eaten with much laughter. When eating was so easy.
Talking, joking and sharing dreams for the new year, when talking was still easy....
Yes, little did we know.

Only one year ago and now dreams are shattered, plans have changed, life as we knew it ... gone.
And i find myself in the ancient turmoil of why all the suffering, the role of God in it and me His child. And strangely enough every time i think about it i have this vivid picture of a fierce battle that Jesus is leading and we, His followers, are all decked out with silver armor, swords, shields and so on.  But we are all also covered in sweat, blood and battle scars and in the midst of a bloody battle. All the time with our eyes on our King who is in the frontline with us. 
Somehow with this picture suffering makes sense. Not in any normal logical way at all but somehow actually makes so much sense.
There He is not just cheering us on but leading in this fierce battle. And there i am wanting to give my all as well.
Not that this picture makes it all easy, or answers the Why’s, but somehow brings a different perspective on it all.
 “For we are not struggling against human beings, but against the rulers, authorities and cosmic powers governing this darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realm. So take up every piece of war equipment God provides; so that when the evil day comes, you will be able to resist; and when the battle is won, you will still be standing.”
Ephesians 6:12-13 
Trusting Jesus in the midst of this darkness and year of impossible losses is really all i can do. We are in a battle - there is no denying that. I want to stand firm with what the Lord has given me. It won’t help asking Why, Why and Why in the thick of things. Understanding will come but not now. Now i need to put on that war equipment and stand my ground.

Bella, strangely comforted by a picture of war

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  2. Amen. Stay cocooned in Him, Bella. You're doing well. I'm reminded of Daniel 3 portion: "...and what god is there who can deliver you out of my hands?”

    16Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego replied to the king, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to give you an answer concerning this matter. 17“If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the furnace of blazing fire; and He will deliver us out of your hand, O king. 18“But even if He does not, let it be known to you, O king, that we are not going to serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.” (Here's a beautiful rendition of It Is Well With My Soul -- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHe_qmo3gX4)

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