Perspective oh where art thou??

I do wonder sometimes how my life looks from God’s perspective, because from here below it sure does not look successful…..

I became a believer 15 years ago after trying and searching in my own way to come close to God, but in the end He did it all!  Since then I have never doubted my salvation – but my worth, oh many times!

From an earthly perspective my most productive years really were the three years spent at Bible college – even though I only did 1 ½ year of studies, I still ministered in the Kid’s Club, Home Based Care, reaching out to Mozambique, etc.  After that, and obviously as my life with three small children of my own (born in 3 years!!), got more busy at home, ministry opportunities dwindled.  And not of lack of trying!  I did courses with students at night when the boys were asleep and so on, but as time went by things just changed – it was as if God was holding me back.  Yes, I did reach out in a different way – moms and tots for example – but things just didn’t work out as I had planned…….

And now here in the bush where we live and I homeschool my kids, keep the house (which just takes way more time as everything has to be done from scratch!) and I try and learn the local language I just feel so useless.  I can’t share the Gospel with anyone (yet), I can’t help too much (and create dependency), and it sometimes feels as if I can’t do anything……

BUT, this is when I look at my life through the world’s eyes – and yes, even through the churches’ eyes!  God sees and does things differently.  And here’s an object lesson just for me…..

As I was typing this up I was called out to help our chief who sprained his ankle and then a small boy with a burn wound….when I finished bandaging them, I looked up into the most amazing smile coming from the little boy!  And this coming from a Y who can be so stoic.  (I once pulled out a thorn 6cm long, without the patient even wincing, crying or anything!)  So, I got my reward and am reminded to look through God’s eyes at my life – even though in other’s eyes I might be nothing I can know that God values me, so, so much….and you too.

Recently a close friend wrote – for Bella – Isaiah 43:4 “Since you are precious and honoured in My sight, and because I love you, I will give men in exchange for you and people in exchange for your life.’

Bella, as always blown away by Pappa God’s love for me.